| (no subject) |
[Jan. 8th, 2009|03:13 pm] |
okay, clean slate:
link
Not because I think there's anything inherently special about a brand new account, but because my mind is too muddled to pick this one up where I left off.
I also didn't add all the same friends, but that's only because my friends page here was overwhelming. It's public; please feel free to add me or just read my posts or whatever you like. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 12th, 2008|02:00 pm] |
My absence last semester was because it was a terrible, no good, very bad (TNGVB) semester. I have no such excuse for my absence this summer. It has been a great summer. I've been working at Gamestop, which is better than I'd ever imagined it would be -- great job, great co-workers. I am about to return to UNC for the fall, but I remain a Gamestop employee. Which means, I can work over breaks to earn some money, and when I come home next summer, I'll immediately have work.
I am very excited to be returning to UNC. I am anxious to move past the TNGVB semester. I think I've done a lot of growing up (even though I always seem to feel that way and then look back and laugh) and I've got some new attitudes and mindsets to apply to my studies. For instance, instead of approaching the semester and aiming for a 3.0 GPA, then being disappointed when I don't attain that, I'm going to aim for a 4.0 GPA. This is a goal which I will reach only with great difficulty, and it would be not only vain but foolish for that goal to be an expectation. My expectation is that, by aiming higher than I ever have, I can achieve more than I ever have. Stay tuned to see if it works.
I have lots of pretty new books for my three literature classes this semester. Buying new on Amazon is roughly equivalent to buying used at Student Stores. 30% Barnes and Noble discount also helps. And any of my dear friends in Chapel Hill can make use of that wonderful price reduction whenever they want. I encourage love of literature.
And of course, I'm very much looking forward to being with my friends again. I'm counting down the days to seeing Becky again; sadly, I don't know how soon I'll see the rest of them. But I know it will be soon, and there's nothing sad about that.
Off to pack. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 23rd, 2008|05:16 am] |
Since high school, I've known I wanted to try growing a beard. I was honest enough with myself to know I did not have the follicular power to grow one. Last summer, I tried meekly and found meager success. I gave up and shaved. This past December, I tried again and persisted into early February. I had something decent at that point, but I realized that the beard (if you could call it that) was a contrivance; I wanted to be older and the facial hair made me feel like a grown-up. I knew I wasn't yet. I shaved again.
Through sheer laziness and lack of attention, I have found myself growing a beard once more. I think I'm going to keep it. To me, it symbolizes the fact that I cannot choose to stay young and immature. I am growing into an adult and I have to accept that and grow in maturity as well. The beard will remind me that I no longer have the luxury of immaturity.
All that from a beard? Sheesh. Will it change me? I don't know.
I feel like I've been losing myself this semester for a number of reasons. One reason is that I'm not I'm not pursuing my passions, most notably literature. Also of note is the vacancy of this Livejournal. It's one way I keep in touch with myself and I intend to update it more frequently.
Goodnight. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 23rd, 2008|04:57 pm] |
snow in the lights
I feel like this picture really represents how I feel inside right now.
Quiet, gray, calm, pensive.
I get this way every winter, I think. The snow this weekend really brought it out in me.
To feel even more like I do, go listen to Iron and Wine, or better yet, Sufjan's Michigan album. It is, in my opinion, the quintessential winter album. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 14th, 2007|12:28 am] |
So, the semester is over.
From an academic standpoint, I won't miss this semester. Good riddance, even. I mean, I learned a lot of really cool stuff this semester, but I'm worn out by the academic treadmill.
On the social side of things, though, this semester was fantastic. At Carolina I'm surrounded by amazing people who make every day fantastic.
I spent a lot of time studying in the library this semester. It's the setting for one anecdote I want to share that is demonstrative of the people in my life and what nerds we are. One night, Tyler points out the skeletal formula scrawled on the wall in sharpie. He wonders aloud which molecule it is. We all know immediately what it must be: caffeine. So that's the first sign of geekery. Second sign is having a skeletal formula for caffeine pulled up in about ten seconds. Third sign is noticing the graffiti is missing a CH3. Fourth sign is coming back later with a sharpie to fix it.
Not that all my friends are geeks like me, and not that I only love those who are, but this story was on my mind. I guess I was reading xkcd or something.
Anyway, that's just one story out of hundreds. Jonathan waking me up yesterday to ask me for advice about shoes, then saying, "the important thing now is that we're naked and we're friends," is the next to come to mind. I'll stop now before I get carried away. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 3rd, 2007|06:31 pm] |
On my bookshelf, one can observe a "Pride and Prejudice" DVD sitting right next to the Die Hard trilogy.
My tastes are kind of weird. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 30th, 2007|09:49 am] |
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Suddenly, last night, I felt that most of what I've been doing for a while has been terribly juvenile. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 26th, 2007|12:02 pm] |
Yes, I'm still alive. Time to shake some dust off of the ol' Live Journal.
After my "sleep addiction" discovery, I continued to grapple with my bad habits. I had on-and-off success, and I ended up focusing on the battle so intently that I neglected my internet communication. I often had the same away message up on AIM for days. I'm getting a grip and I'm back now.
I don't have a whole lot to say. Life goes on as it always does. Sometimes it seems like the little moments are the really important, stand-out ones in a day, like on the way to English class when I wished that everyone around me could hear the soundtrack to my day (Tegan and Sara). By the time I get here, though, the moments have dimmed. Besides that, they are by nature ineffable. Sigh. Well, I tried.
I deleted my World of Warcraft account this week. Go me.
Okay, I'm in class. Bye. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 15th, 2007|07:50 pm] |
I currently have a problem that I haven’t been taking as seriously as I should. It’s time to face up to it and acknowledge it for what it is.
I have been seriously, seriously struggling with my sleeping schedule this semester. Staying up late or even all night has become an addiction. I think it’s been hard to treat it like a real problem because it doesn’t seem like a real problem. I mean, addiction? Smoking is addictive. Pornography is addictive. But pulling all-nighters is hardly a traditional addiction. Still, how do you define ‘addiction?’ It’s something that makes you feel good that you can’t stop, even when it starts to hurt you. Yeah, I’ve been addicted. It’s been detrimental to my health and possibly my mental well-being (it’s hard to tell).
I think this is connected to the fact that my relationship with God is stagnant. I have no prayer life and I hardly ever read the Bible. I’ve been going to church and small group on a regular basis, but I need more than that. Last night I reconnected with God in a small way and I intend to keep working on our relationship. That, I think, will significantly improve my situation.
I want to use this post as an apology to everyone. By maintaining an unhealthy relationship, I haven’t been as good a friend as I want to be. I’d like that to change. Please understand that I’ve been struggling recently and that I think things are going to get better. I’m starting a zero-tolerance policy with myself – mandatory bedtime of midnight every night, or at least a bedtime that allows me eight hours if I don’t have class in the morning. Class is tied into this; I’ve skipped a lot of them. That’s not okay. I went to all my classes today and I’m going to go to bed at midnight. I think I’m getting on the right track.
Thanks for accepting me and loving me in spite of my flaws.
In closing, I want to share the lyrics of a song that sums up exactly how I’ve been feeling today.
( Who I Am Hates Who I've Been )
So, yeah. I'm pretty ashamed and humbled. But I'm ready to admit that and move on. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 12th, 2007|08:06 pm] |
My room is an Eastern European sonic adventure. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 4th, 2007|09:08 am] |
I've spent the night and the morning alternately preparing for my sociology midterm and taking breaks from preparing. I have gone to great lengths to ensure that I stay awake during this midterm: I am swimming in a haze of caffeine, taurine, and guarana. Note to self: never, ever, again rely on coffee and energy drinks at the same time to stay energized. I feel sick as a dog.
Then again, maybe that's because the filter in our room is probably disgusting and covered with mold. They should change it soon, but it's too late. I'm already plagued by a myriad of generic symptoms. I've run the gamut from headache and chills to sore throat and raspy voice. Ugh.
I am confident that I will survive this midterm, but I may not last long after that. I'm coughing and sniffling something fierce right now and I just want to sleep until I'm all better.
like two pennies on the train track the train crushed into one |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 4th, 2007|01:30 am] |
So, Nick's fish, Plato is dying.
We think.
See that tendril? Trailing from it are what Jonathan asserts are Plato's bowels. I think he might be mistaken. In any case, these fish parts have ascended and descended a few times over the past few weeks. Plato hasn't actually eaten food in about a week. I suspect that he is the "Jesus fish" -- perhaps he died, unbeknown to us, and now he lives out this grotesque, pathetic eternal life. We may intervene tomorrow with what Nick has called "piscine euthanasia." A toilet flush, one last adventure? Or perhaps we shall journey to some authentic flowing water; a stream that won't end in a septic tank. These various alternatives consume our thoughts.
"Andrew, those are its bowels. Its bowels, Andrew. Do you see this? Plato has lost his bowels."
I've had the hiccups five distinct times today. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 3rd, 2007|12:58 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Death Cab For Cutie - Expo 86 | ] |
So, I've been listening to a fair selection of new music lately, and I wanted to share my opinions.
First of all, Tegan & Sara. I've mentioned them in passing before. They're Canadian twin sisters with an acoustic, indie-pop sort of sound. I've found them extremely catchy. Their latest album is called "The Con," and I consider it solid all the way through. I recently purchased their next-most-recent album, "So Jealous," and it sounds just as good, if a bit less developed and mature. If you like the tracks on their myspace, I'd definitely recommend picking up "The Con."
Second, (the) Arcade Fire. Best understood as a current indie-rock sensation, they released "Neon Bible" last spring. Lots of social commentary. If you can ignore the constant griping about the church/the government/war/socioeconomic hierarchy in America. I mean, seriously, I think there are two songs on the album that don't have that stuff. Still, it's a solid piece of work. It's got organ and strings and cool stuff like that.
Third, Sam Beam, more commonly known as Iron and Wine. He's got a new album out this month, and I'm not exactly enamored with it. It's got a much more full sound than his prior albums, and a much broader variety of musical influences. It's not bad, but it's definitely not the Iron and Wine I love.
Okay, running out of steam. I'll talk about Jimmy Eat World later. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 24th, 2007|03:09 pm] |
So there's this fashion blog called The Sartorialist. The guy who runs it is some big name in the industry, and he decided to take pictures of interesting fashion he sees around him in day to day life. My friend Jonathan was inspired by the blog and, with a friend, decided to do the same thing here at UNC. If you're into fashion, or just want to see some cool clothes, check it out.
Madras & Mustard |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 24th, 2007|02:55 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Snow Patrol - Run | ] |
Just a random update with a couple of thoughts.
I am struggling with responsibility, especially in the area of getting to bed on time. It seems like instead of making progress, I'm regressing. It's very frustrating.
I am really enjoying living with my hallmates this year, especially Nick and Jonathan. I like all the guys on the hall, but since those two are my roommate and next-door neighbor, I'm in closer proximity with them. They're both really awesome guys and I'm glad to have them as friends.
I should be studying now, so I'll be brief, but those two things were on my mind. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 17th, 2007|03:14 pm] |
Not a real post, but I wanted to share this remark I found in a recent album review. It sums up my sentiments pretty thoroughly:
"[The new Stars album] was released over iTunes months before the vinyl or compact disc will be available in stores. This is a step in the right direction for music as far as I am concerned. Anything that helps kill off the compact disc as the de rigueur musical format. For too long have you reigned, oh bothersome shiny coaster. Take your eighty minute capacity and your plastic spindles. Your obsolescence is a step in the right direction. Take the mainstream high-street retailer with you. You shall not be missed."
Ha! Not that I'm a fan of the iTunes music store, but I acknowledge that first forays into a new medium are naturally bumpy. Also, many of the music's stores faults are due to record label policies, not Apple policies. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 13th, 2007|08:20 pm] |
Life has continued to be normal. Not mundane, and not especially interesting, but normal. Here are some current events.
Jimmy Eat World has a new album coming out on October 16th or something. Val is awesome and has the demos already, so I've listened through it once. I'm definitely going to listen much more thoroughly and I'll save an extended review until then. Anyway, I started thinking about how long it's been since the last JEW full-length release. It's been around three years. Hardly uncommon in the industry. But until now, I've never realized how long three years really is. When I thought back to life three years ago, I couldn't believe how much has changed.
So, I took a stroll down memory lane the other day and read some entries from two and a half years ago in my old LJ. It was disconcerting. One thing I discovered is that I had tons of totally pointless, vague entries. I feel much less guilty about my current habit of posting irregularly, given that my two or three daily posts back then had so little worthwhile information. Also, I just don't like the voice I had back then. I don't know whether it was more of a difference in myself or a difference in my writing voice, but it kind of annoyed me. I guess it's possible that it's my writing voice, and that it's never changed -- I don't critically analyze any of my current LJ writing. But I'm pretty sure I've changed a lot, too. When I try to imagine myself listening to Iron and Wine or Sufjan back then, I have to laugh. I think I've mellowed in my old age.
There was more to say, and I definitely can't remember it. Sigh.
I'm living in the same building as last year, but I'm on a different floor with mostly different hallmates. I miss the guys upstairs, but I'm really enjoying being down here. I've made a ton of new friends, and I still have the old ones. On the other hand, I hope I don't do any more moving around in the years I have left. This spot is definitely worth keeping.
Okay, I can't think of anything else right now. Better do some reading. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 29th, 2007|10:37 am] |
I told Nick last night that this semester is strange. It's both a really great semester and a really bad semester.
This semester is great because all of my classes really interest me; it's great because I'm in a new room and I'm making new friends; it's great because I'm feeling more responsible; it's great because I'm not a freshman anymore.
But this semester also stinks because I've got an ungodly amount of reading for all my classes; it stinks because I miss the people I used to live with; it stinks because marching band is consuming so much of my time; it stinks because my girlfriend is thousands of miles away.
This semester is polarized. I don't think these months will be bad, but I think it will be a relief to arrive at January.
Well, better get reading. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 27th, 2007|09:00 am] |
Sittin in class
really bored |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 22nd, 2007|04:23 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Tegan & Sara - Dark Come Soon (Acoustic) | ] |
So, any Tegan & Sara fans out there? This week I picked up their most recent release, "The Con." It's hardly my favorite CD ever, but it's got some great songs and great musicianship. The album itself isn't worth me raving about, but the sisters did an acoustic performance for some website called "Spinner," I think, and the acoustic versions of these songs are incredible. If you're a T&S fan or an acoustic fan, you should hear them. I've got a video of the whole thing and then MP3s of the different tracks. Let me know. |
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